Archive for April, 2007
Once trust is gone or damaged, rebuilding it is challenging. Although a marriage can be damaged with as few as one bad choice or bad act, rebuilding trust is not so easily or simply accomplished. There is no silver bullet or one quick fix thing that you can do to repair the damage of disloyalty. […]
A question that comes up in dealing with affairs and the aftermath is that of “how far should I go?” arises. Spouses want to know how far they should go in doing things for their partner. Sadly, some partners actually want their spouses to do things that actually contribute to affairs, and the spouses do […]
Many people struggling with affairs strive to understand “why?”. They apply this to the reason for the affair, the reason it happened to them, the reason their spouse was involved. In the search for such answers, the seeker is often looking for a quick-fix skeleton key that answers all. They want a quick one size […]
After providing a list of 10 things to do that strengthen your marriage, it was logical that a list of 10 actions to avoid would be appropriate.
1. Tell your spouse all the details. This often awakens a voyeuristic element, yet makes the guilt a difficult thing to deal with.
2. Do a lot of blaming and […]
People often want to know what can be done to strengthen their marriages. This is a list of some things you can do.
1. Talk to your spouse in a supportive and encouraging manner.
2. Have fun with your spouse.
3. Spend time with your spouse.
4. Talk to your spouse about something they enjoy.
5. Smile at your spouse.
6. […]
In taking a tour of the internet and its resources, I explored the topic of affairs. The word itself is now synonymous with ‘an adventure”. Hollywood has taken the term and has managed to take the bite out of it. When the term itself is associated with an adventure, then what is the stigma that […]
People often ask about how long the hurt will go on. This is a simple question that does not have such a simple answer. In one sense, the initial hurt will diminish within about six months of an affair ending. Like some hurts, there may be triggers and anniversary reactions, but the hurt will eventually […]
The foundations of marriage was addressed in a Latin saying “Consensus non concubitus facit Matrimonium”. A rough translation is that it is the agreement to live with each other and cooperate that make a marriage, not the ability to have physical relations. Marriage still requires cooperation. The very act of infidelity is one of choosing […]
One aspect about affairs that makes dealing with them a challenge is the two in one quality they often contain. There are often two affairs that have to be dealt with. There is the actual physical affair and then there is the mental or virtual affair. Each has a different set of dynamics. In the […]
Those with common sense would know the answer to this question. Sadly, many times people in the midst of promiscuous lifestyles do not recognize what common sense when it confronts them. The mental gymnastics performed to justify actions like swinging also serve to blind them to the reality of affair dynamics. In responding to the […]
