Archive for April, 2009
If you want to be notified the next time I write something, sign up for email alerts or subscribe to the RSS Feed. Thanks for reading. Elizabeth Edwards’ book Resiliance, addresses her reaction to her celebrity husband’s affair. In the book, she describes her reactions to the affair. Among those reactions were throwing up. […]
Some couples while recovering from affairs find themselves dealing with ‘ghost affairs’. A ‘ghost affair’ is the term I use in referring to the residual image or afterglow of an affair. What often happens is that the infidel reminisces about the affair relationship. These reminisces often take on a romanticizing of the events and persons […]
A major part of affairs concerns fantasy. In some ways, an affair shares similarities with a connect the dots game, except with affairs, many of the dots you want to connect are missing. One area where they are missing regards the ‘other woman’ (or other man). Although the infidel reports being in love with them, […]
At a conference I attended, the presenter made a remark which has stuck with me over the years. He said, “No one leaves a good lover except a sex addict”. This is one of those statements that has more meaning as I meditate on his statement. One of the truths that I have realized is […]
Although it seems an odd question to pose, some couples caught in affair situations do not make the choices and changes necessary to save their marriage.
Instead, one major offender is that they make choices that keep the existing patterns, and the associated pain going. It is almost a matter that it is easier to deal […]
Contrary to the excuses made concerning affairs, they don’t ‘just happen’. When a cheating spouse is found out, they may come across as sincere in their bewilderment as to how such a thing could have happened. The offending spouse may have been totally unaware of the events leading up to the infidelity and when they […]
In listening to some selections from my music collection, I heard the song “Temptation Eyes” by the Grass Roots. The song contains some basic truths of use for those struggling with infidelity and temptation. Temptation and affairs often go together. There are also several temptations at work at any given time. There is the temptation […]
After an affair has been discovered, one of the challenges couples face concerns the issue of punishment. The resolute spouse often feels the desire to punish the offending spouse who was involved in the affair. The type and severity of punishment often varies from couple to couple. For some couples, the punishment is corporal. A […]
One of the questions often asked of affairs is ‘why?’ Although the question is often asked, not many couples seek a full understanding of dynamics. Most often they want to find someone to blame or something to blame. The why question is asked only to ascertain whose fault it is. When questions are asked only […]
Although the practice of ’swinging’ is portrayed as hip and cool, the reality is often very different. What was once labeled as ‘wife swapping’ or ‘open marriage’ has been given the title of swinging in order to have more mass appeal.
I cannot speak for all swingers, but only for the ones that I have worked […]
