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One of the more tragic affair situations that I have encountered are those where a spouse exploits their partner. The exploitations I have dealt with have run the gamut from letting other people use one’s spouse as in a swingers party to using the sexual favors of one’s wife to pay for the husband to pay the amount due for a drug deal. Such situations are ugly. Besides being ugly, they are painful for those involved to discuss.

Such situations are more painful since there is a deliberate rejection of their spouse. Added to the rejection is using them as sexual object for their selfish gratification. In many of these cases, the wife has already been emotionally beat down. They are at a point where they are willing to do anything to please their husbands. The husband’s are aware of their vulnerability and exploit it. The offer of “I will do anything” is taken up on. In such cases, they have their wives do anything and everything that they can imagine. With each each act of debauchery, the wife often feels more shame and hurt. When the situation finally spins out of control, there are often sexual addictions or a lifestyle of being trapped into something they do not know how to escape from. In such situations, the spouse has turned into a sexual slave.

Waking up to the unnaturalness of such situations is a start. The victims and their spouses need to become aware that such lifestyles are not fulfilling. Once there is an awareness, then steps can be taken to emerge from the lifestyle and repair the marriage, when possible. In many cases, the spouse is so far gone, they are cold and hard to any emotional pleas or hurts of their spouse. Extricating oneself from such situations is not easy, but it is well worth the struggle.

Best Regards,

Jeffrey Murrah

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