Archive for December, 2009
If you want to be notified the next time I write something, sign up for email alerts or subscribe to the RSS Feed. Thanks for reading. The dating service known as “Ashley Madison” (they call themselves an agency) often advertises their services as “Life is Short, Have an Affair”. They even go so far […]
As the year of 2009 nears its end, I wanted to share what were the top 10 most popular posts of the past year, based on daily traffic numbers.
1. The Sexing up of Popular Culture-June
2. Punish Me!-April
3&4. The Tyranny of Consenting Adults-July
5. Temptations are all around us-April
6. The Dark Side of Swinging
7. “Is there any […]
In bygone days, people used terms like tramps, sluts, adulterers and whore mongers to describe sets of behavior that were often seen in people who engaged in infidelity. Over the years, the concept of beauty along with morals have changed so much that identifying such behavior is not as easy as it once was. The […]
Whenever loyalties are mixed, there are potential problems. Mixed loyalties are one of the major source of problems in blended families. Mixed loyalties are also a major source of problems with affairs. The mixed loyalty issue is easily seen when the adulterer (or adultress) is torn between their lover and their spouse. The mixed loyalties […]
Although Christmas time is often associated with joy, in dysfunctional families, the holidays often bring out the worst in their dysfunctioning. When the dysfunction comes out, there are often arguments, fights, threats, suicidal thoughts, binge drug/alcohol abuse and other problem behaviors. When those who grew up in such circumstances are faced with the pain of […]
Fear is a powerful motivating force. Fear keeps some spouses from even mentioning their suspicions of an affair. Fear is what keeps the adulterer from bringing up the affair. Fear is what keeps the couple from discussing what is missing in their marriage and what their needs are. Instead, they may complain about the secondary […]
Although Oedipus made the fateful declaration of “I married my mother!”, many couples discover after being married a few years that they also have married someone like their parents. Making such choices carries with it heavy emotional baggage, especially when there have been affairs in the family history. In such situations it is easy to […]
Affairs often bring out the childish parts of people and their personalities. One of the children’s games that often occurs is “They have to make the first move”. In this game, the parties keep a tense status quo in their relationship, while each waits on the other to make the first move. With such a […]
In the arguments that often accompany affairs, it is common to hear the phrase, “I didn’t mean what I said”. When this phrase occurs with great frequency, there are problems in the relationship that are larger than the affair. This is a phrase often heard among people struggling with co-dependency in their relationships. Just because […]
Within the recovery community are many nuggets of wisdom that have many applications for other areas, including dealing with affairs and their aftermath. One of those nuggets is to “Stick with winners”. This saying has many applications for marriages. One being that when your marriage relationship is strained, it is not the time to hang […]
