Reducing Infidelity rumors at work

Rumors about infidelity can hurt you and your family as much as an actual affair. When these rumors happen at work they ruin not only reputations, but  cripple careers.

Although there are many ways of dealing with rumors of infidelity, you have to consider which interventions are the best fit for the work environment.

Prevention is always easier on the front end, than reducing the damage on the back end. With this in mind, the most effective way of reducing such rumors is taking steps to prevent them before they happen.

Preventing them includes avoiding situations that may foster rumors. This means avoiding eating out or drinking alone with members of the opposite sex.

It’s especially important when handling out of town travel. The appearance of impropriety is often all it takes.

Although Vice-President Pence is ridiculed for doing this, the strategy works.

Prevention also means shunning sexually oriented humor and situations.It’s not that you don’t have a sense of humor, it’s that humor is now used against people.

Humor can be used against you as well. Avoiding such situations reduces your legal liability.

You’ll also want to dress modestly on a regular basis, so that there’s little chance of rumors taking root.

When rumors occur, you’ll want to conduct yourself in a modest manner (dress, appearance, jokes, associations, etc.). You first want to contain the damage by not giving any opportunities for them to spread.

This includes keeping appropriate personal space from others. You may also want to make sure that your cologne or perfume is not seductive  or sensual in any way.

You can still be fashionable, yet modest. Remove any sign of seductiveness or improper sexuality.

If you are a person who touches people when talking with them, you’ll need to change that. Touching others can be interpreted in ways you never intended.

How you deal with the rumors depends on whether they are coming from the boss, peers, customers or employees. The workplace adds the dimension of hierarchies.

Each level of the business activity has its own protocol and ways of dealing with rumors. Peers can be dealt with informally.

Rumors from bosses or employees often require special handling, since there are power issues intertwined with the rumors. Sex and power are  a potent combination, even when they are only rumors.

If you work in an office setting, you’ll want to deal with the rumors in a professional manner. Rumors of an affair are a form of slander.

You wouldn’t tolerate slander. You also need to not tolerate such rumors.

They’ll need addressing as quickly and quietly as possible. If you don’t have a reputation for wrong behaviors, such matters are often dismissed and quashed quickly.

If your reputation is less than spotless, handling the rumors carries with it the risk of previous improprieties being exposed. This means that silencing the rumors carry the risk of your past behaviors being exposed. Such situations often leave some people vulnerable to the negative impact of such rumors.

It’s important to dismiss the rumors without being defensive or argumentativeness. Reacting defensively or arguing makes the situation worse than it needs to be.

Even in the aftermath of rumors, trust is damaged. You’ll want the trust repaired as quickly as possible. The video, “How Can I Trust You Again?” deals with the topic of trust and what it takes in rebuilding it.

Although designed for affairs, the trust formula can also be used in repairing workplace relationships.

Best Regards,

Jeff

 

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2 Responses

  1. When I commented after DDay that people at work probably knew what he was up to with the young woman he started cheating with who had.been a stranger approaching him in a restaurant….the. After beginning the adultery he HIRED her and the. Made her his business partner! He said that rumors were always speculating about co workers in his business and the best way he and she dealt with them was to ignore them

    My husband early on did not display photos of me or his children as other married men in his workplace did….and even earlier on he declined to wear his adding ring claiming at that time as he was in the sports field he could “lose a finger”!

    Funny men who love their wives and honor marriage find that they ,CAN put the ring back on after their sport!

    I got played for YEARS!

    I am learning how to help my daughters learn to identify and avoid such wicked men….and women…in and outside the church..

    It’s difficult these days as deception is the most prominent identification of the day’s toward the end of the age of Grace

    It certainly appears to be on the rise in our day and time…..and increasingly so

    Sad

    Our hope is in the scriptures exhortations of what this means in terms of the snatching away of the body of Christ☺️

    1. Zaza,

      Wow! He hired her after the affair! That is some kind of brazenness! Although it should not shock me how far people will go to have, hide and keep affairs alive, it does. I find myself amazed at how far the mind will stretch and how extreme people go. It does not help that he did not have pictures of ya’ll at work. That is unfortunate.

      The denial that allows you to be played can be VERY strong. Some spouses know how to play into the denial in order to keep it going, even to the point of getting you to self-doubt your own suspicions and gut feelings. They lure you into trusting them, rather than the leading of the Holy Spirit, your gut or your senses.

      These days, deception is running rampant. It is at the point where it is more common to hear and believe lies than the truth. Those who dare speak the truth are marginalized and made to feel like they are the ‘freaks’.

      I wish you well in teaching your daughters what to look for. Hopefully they will learn that lesson well and know the early warning signs (e.g. avoiding pictures on the desk, time away from home, more time with members of the opposite sex, etc. ).

      Regards,

      Jeff

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