In modern society, many of you have been trained to respect science. When something is scientific, you consider it proven or ‘factual’.
So whats the science regarding affairs? What can science tell us about affairs? Bear in mind that true science is based on observable, measurable phenomena.
Theoretical science is just that, theoretical. Theoretical science is about guessing and supposing. Theories guess as to what’s going on, what causes it and what may happen. This is not true science, it’s speculation or educated guesswork.
In terms of what I consider pure science when it comes to affairs, there are things we know about the inner workings of the brain.
There have been medical studies regarding brain and brain functioning. Such studies tell us that the mind of an addict, including sexual addicts react differently than non-addicted minds.
The addicted mind requires more ‘stimulation’ in higher cortical areas just to feel ‘normal’. This means that they (the addicted population) react differently to provocative stimuli than the non-addicted brain.
Studies have also shown that they not only want more stimulation, they process information differently. This means that cheaters who are sexual addicts will not think or react the same as those that are not sexual addicts.
The sexual addicts brain is different and thinks differently than non-addicted people.
It also means that sexual addiction is not just play time, or something between two adults. The brain is changed by such activities.
Does this mean that sexual addiction warps the brain? Yes, it means that sexual addiction warps your brain.
Scientists don’t like talking in those terms, but that’s what it amounts to. The neurons along with how they process stimulation has been altered. They don’t think like other people do.
There are also studies proving that your emotions impact your thinking. Many studies have begun exploring just how your emotional state impacts your thinking.
This includes looking at what anger, arousal, sadness and happiness in terms of the impact they have on thinking. Science has isolated the neurotransmitters activated in each of these emotional states.
They also have some understanding of how each of these states trigger reactions in your nervous system.
The science behind the emotional state of arousal has led to the development of viagra, cialis and other medications to enhance arousal by playing with neurotransmitters. Such playing with neurotransmitters allows for more sexual activity, but at what cost?
Couples have more sex, but do you feel closer or more bonded?
Are the side effects of sudden hearing loss and vision loss actually signs that someone’s nervous system has been damaged by extended use?
Have you considered that the parts of the brain impacted by such meds are the ones controlling sex drive and emotions? Are you aware of the increased risk of aggression with such meds?
Such medications allow cheaters to achieve arousal even in situations that their conscience would interfere with arousal. Science has allowed cheaters to bypass nature.
By claiming to help with ED (erectile dysfunction) they have provided chemicals which play games with the neurotransmitters and natural processes. When a medication alters neurotransmitters, it alters your behavior and thinking.
The ED meds help with ED, but have you considered that some ED was related to emotional issues?
Spouses should have been bonding and working through intimacy issues rather than taking the chemical short cut. This chemical short cut is allowing cheaters to indulge in sex with others and their spouse without having to develop emotional closeness.
Science has been used to bypass nature and natural processes.
Science has proven that such medications help with ED, but has it really helped marriages? Has it helped your marriage?
Is your marriage stronger as a result of what science has given us? Is the ability to have chemically-enhanced sex helping your marriage?
Would you rather have the chemical enhancements or to have you and your spouse have to get closer to each other on an emotional level and develop intimacy naturally?
If you are looking for a place to discuss such issues and others related to affair recovery, consider joining the support community at Restored Lifestyle. There, you’ll find videos, resources and others who are struggling with issues like yours.
Best Regards,
Jeff
