PTSD and Unfaithful Spouses

A reader asked the question, “Can you get PTSD from your spouse being unfaithful?” This kind of question deals with some heavy duty diagnosis-related issues, which makes a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’ response challenging.

Without knowing the symptoms, or context I can’t make a clear or even fuzzy assessment of the situation.

What I can tell you is that some spouses react strongly to unfaithfulness.  The reaction to spousal unfaithfulness happens along a continuum of reactions.

Some of you may feel relief, some irritation, some rage, some sick to your stomach or even more severe symptoms/reactions. Your early life traumas also play a role in how well you bounce back from the jarring news of an unfaithful spouse.

With such a wide range of reactions to spousal unfaithfulness, one answer doesn’t fit all situations. What is clear is that due to the nature of the relationship, the actions of one spouse does often impact the other.

Although the world often operates according to the “It’s my life and I’ll do what I want!” mindset, what you do impacts those around you. The closer you are to them, the greater the impact.

Finding out that your spouse was unfaithful shakes some of you to your core being. When something shakes you to the being of your core self, there will be outside symptoms.

These symptoms can be very intense. The diagnosis of PTSD should only be made by a healthcare professional with experience in dealing with the symptoms involved. All too often, you may assume that you are experience some disorder based on an article you read rather than it being based on the assessment of a healthcare professional.

Initially the diagnosis of PTSD was reserved for situations such as being a prisoner of war,  or the victim of severe abusive trauma. Over time, the diagnosis has been used for a wider variety of situations, usually involving reactions to abusive behavior occurring over a period of time.

Your healthcare professional can help you with questions as to whether or not the symptoms you are experiencing are a form of PTSD.

Although you may not have had some of the intense experiences often associated with PTSD, the consistent repeated exposure to stressful situations or sudden radical changes in your relationships or a lifetime of many stressful incidents may all contribute to PTSD conditions.

Many times the early life traumas return to your awareness like unwanted summer reruns, making the situation worse. Not only do traumas return you to hurts in your life, the more times you return, the greater the likelihood of getting stuck there.

Yes, you can get stuck in a PTSD state. Being stuck in PTSD is horrifying. It’s as if the trauma is on-going. The pain and fear continue day after day without letting up.

The good news is there is hope. You don’t have to continue suffering in desperate silence. The video “Preventing Affair Trauma” gives you the tools for unsticking yourself from that state.

Best Regards,

Jeff

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