One night my wife talked me into attending a networking event in Austin. Like most events, you wander through the people and conversations. Eventually the conversation covers what you do for a living. I was surprised when I saw Tammy’s reaction to what I do for a living. her eyes lit up, her demeanor changed right before my eyes. “That’s wonderful!” she exclaimed. In a few minutes, she was telling me all about her marriage and how things turned around after an affair put everything ‘on the rocks’.
Tammy’s response surprised me in it heart-felt sincerity. What she began sharing about the changes in her marriage and how grateful she was for these changes were coming from her heart. She loved her husband and it showed, both in terms of enthusiasm and gratefulness for how she now had him back.
Her enthusiasm was contagious. It was as if the energy level of the whole room was suddenly turned up. It surprised me seeing this kind of enthusiasm from someone who was not a newlywed and whose marriage experienced an affair. It was so refreshing hearing an encouraging story rather than the typical heart-breaking stories associated with affairs.
Tammy’s situation was one of those marriages that improved after the affair. Sure, she went through the dark times where her marriage was under the shadow of a dead relationship. Fortunately she and her husband didn’t stop there. They didn’t let the discouragement stop them. They didn’t let their fears stunt the potential of their marriage.
After an affair or even a rough patch, things can look and feel pretty hopeless. You may even wonder if your marriage and your life can ever move past the tough times. You may feel like the two of you lost each other along the way. Yes, something has been lost, and it can also be rediscovered.
Your situation may be one where you and your spouse are settling for making it through the affair. Your marriage survived, yet at times it feels like the two of you are strangers living with each other. You are still married but the emotional distance feels like a canyon.
Your marriage doesn’t have to remain hopeless. You also don’t have to settle for having an emotional chasm between the two of you. Your marriage can improve instead of you putting up with it being stagnant or lackluster.
Tammy told me the secret to her enthusiasm. That secret was the inspiration behind “30 Days to a Better Marriage” program.
Rather than settling or putting up with each other, you can enjoy each other.
Rather than feeling the two of you are living in separate world, the two of you can again enjoy each others’ company.
Rather than thinking that the two of you have nothing more to say to each other, you can once more feel connected with your spouse.
Imagine enjoying your spouse’s company again. You can once more look forward to talking with them and hearing what they have to share instead of dreading what comes out of their mouth.
You can turn your marriage around from ‘tolerable’ to better in only 30 days. Having a better marriage reduces your stress, improves your confidence, and take a huge burden off your heart and mind. I would tell you it takes just minutes a day, yet when the communication channels open up, you and your spouse make take more time talking than just a few minutes.
A recent study at the University of Missouri showed healthy marriages lead to better physical and mental health. A better marriage does wonders for you in more ways that you may have thought possible.
The “30 Days to a Better Marriage” email series takes only minutes a day, over a 30 day period. Each day, you will receive an email with instructions for you to follow. In following the instructions, a multi-dimensional transformation begins. The program is designed based on findings from communication techniques and relationship skills. Address your relationship needs across several dimensions, so that transformation is occurring in several areas of your marriage at the same time.
This unique ‘multi-dimensional approach’ to improving communication removes the obstacles to your relationship and opens up new ways of connecting with each other. With the graduated 30 day program, you and your spouse develop healthy new communication habits, have deeper intimacy and greater connectedness.
The “30 Days to a Better Marriage” helps bring big changes in many areas in an enjoyable non-threatening manner. You will be surprised at the changes that begin occurring during the 30 day program.
The foundation to any relationship is communication. When your foundation is solid, your relationship has more security, stability and soundness.
55 Responses
My wife will not folly counselor instructions to better our marriage.
Robert,
Can you elaborate on this and give an example? That will help me better understand what is going on along with some context. Not knowing the context makes any kind of response challenging.