In putting together my next webinar on ‘communication’ , I was reminded of the power of “Wimpy promises”.
As a child, Looked forward to enjoying a diet of Old Popeye cartoons on coming home from school. The books went down and the television turned on. Although Tex Avery cartoons were my favorite, I enjoyed the plentiful Popeye cartoons.
With the Popeye cartoons, the older ones were better than the recent ones. In some ways, the older Popeye cartoons with Wimpy, Brutus, Olive, and even Alice the Goon were funnier along with having a timelessness the modern ones didn’t have.
One of the themes running consistent through them were the promises of J. Wellington Wimpy (yes, that was his full name). He loved hamburgers and always promising payment in the future for a hamburger today. He always had good intentions, but never any substance.
When it comes to affair recovery or recovery from many problems in marriage, a frequent fault are “Wimpy promises”. What I am referring to as ‘Wimpy promises’ are the promises and assurances about the future.
The offending spouse promises things will change. “I promise you, I’ll be different”. “Things will improve”. This will get better. “I’ll be a different person”. All these promises are predicated on ‘tomorrow’ or the future.
What makes them Wimpy promises is that you’re doing nothing today. There is no proof of change. Rather than make the changes now, it is ‘next Tuesday’ or some other day in the future.
Spouses look at what’s going on now. They look at what you’re doing and how you’re treating them now. Promises about the future make you feel better. Those promises may be your good intentions. They may be your dreams. If you are not doing them now, your message is confusing.
Your spouse looks at what you’re doing more than what you’re promising. They look at how you treat them now, rather than how good you’ll be to them. Rather than make “Wimpy” promises, start your good changes today. Improving yourself with the “30 Days to a Better Marriage” is a great start on those improvements.
Best Regards,
Jeff
