You say that you want healing, that you want your marriage back, yet have you considered the cost of healing? There are costs in each stage of the healing process.
The cost I wish drawing your attention to in today's post is that of 'reaching out for help'.
The first part of the recovery process is realizing that there is a problem. Just the fact that you're reading this blog tells me that you've likely come to that realization.
At this point, you know that there is a problem, as evidenced by the affair. Now, you are faced with "What are you going to do about it?"
This is what I call 'reaching out for help'. When you know the problem exists, you'll have to reach out for help. Even with the internet, help does not come knocking on your door. You still have to reach out in some way.
You may have to order something, sign up for something or subscribe to something. All of these actions are part of reaching out.
When you reach out, you begin assuming responsibility as well. In reaching out, you begin taking control of what was once an 'out of control' situation. You can't control your spouse, you can't control your emotions, and your can't control what others do.
The place where you start losing the 'out of control' feeling is when you reach out. Reaching out is not cost free. You take risks when you reach out. You admit that you're not superman or superwoman who can handle anything that comes your way. You give up your superpowers and become human.
On becoming human, you're suddenly vulnerable and start feeling hurts along the way. You also make mistakes. If you're determined, you learn from those mistakes. When you get knocked down, you pull yourself up and try again.
Getting help often includes financial costs as well. The better resources have price tags. You begin considering what your marriage is actually worth to you. You may say, "I'll do anything" which sounds good when you're making up. When it comes to affair recovery, you and your spouse discover how much of those promises are just talk.
Although you say, "I'll do anything", you find out how much you're willing to spend in terms of time and money. Effective recovery costs you. If your marriage is really important to you, it'll show in how you spend your time and your money.
If you spend neither on your marriage recovery, or aim for cut-rate recovery, it says a great deal about your values. A cut-rate recovery gives you a cut-rate marriage.
If your marriage needs help, you'll want to consider the Affair Recovery Workshop. It'll cost you in terms of time and some money. Your marriage is worth the cost and then some.