Knowing when to face them and when to run away

The experience of being chased out of a business is embarrassing and awkward as well. In some cases, I suppose it could be fun, yet I haven’t had one of those situations yet.

In my case, I was chased out of businesses twice and a school once for collecting debts. It was hard enough asking people for money. When they hide from you it makes it harder. Some people complicated things by lying to me. It was awkward being chased out, especially when I was  just doing my job.

I recall one episode when the person I asked to speak to lied directly to my face about her not being there. I thought, “Well, no harm, no foul. If she doesn’t work here, there’s nothing else for me to do here”.

At that moment, some large authoritative figures came through the door toward me and proceeded ushering me out. I realized in a flash that I’d been lied to. To make matters worse, afterwards she sued me on top of that.

There were also situations I had to run away from. When guns came out, it was time to run.

I learned many lessons about people and how they change when you get down to real issues. I learned what needs to be faced and what bad situations you need to run away from.

The best strategy of dealing with sexual temptations, like affairs is running away, while conflicts, even uncomfortable ones, like money issues are something you have to face.

With cheaters, they do just the opposite. They run away from conflict, yet are willing to stand up and face sexual temptations. They avoid getting real in conflicts with you, yet are willing to face, question and challenge all kinds of sexual issues with their lover(s).

Their thinking needs some serious rewiring if they want to save their marriage. When you realize how turned around their thinking is, it’ll help you in dealing with them during recovery and afterwards. Even when the affair is over, their mind and its twisted wiring remains.

Getting your marriage healthy again means their brain needs help being reprogrammed and values reformatted. This is why Affair Relapse is an important part of recovery. You can lose what progress you’ve made if you handle the risk of affair relapse poorly.

The video, “Overcoming Affair Relapse” guides you in handling the tricky parts of urges, high risk situations and relapse prevention plans. Part of your plan needs to include when to ‘run away’ and when to stay and face uncomfortable matters. Mixing them up is dangerous for your marriage.

Best Regards,

Jeff

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