If you want to be notified the next time I write something, sign up for email alerts or subscribe to the RSS Feed. Thanks for reading.

My sons made me aware of the term ‘facebook stalking’. One can not deal with the issue of stalking without addressing facebook. There are many types of stalking that occurs in conjunction with facebook.

When an affair is suspected, the resolute spouse may ’stalk’ the infidel by using facebook. By reading through posts on the wall and other areas of facebook, they are looking for evidence of what they already suspect. Another sign that raises suspicions is when one’s spouse is denied access to the facebook profile or that the suspected spouse has a secondary facebook account. Already facebook is being mentioned in 20% of divorces filed, which is a concerning trend.

Another type is when one spouse is contemplating an affair and begins searching facebook for old flames. Facebook makes connection with old flames or even new ones much easier. The ability to search for people around the world puts many old flames within easy reach. Facebook also makes it easy to connect with someone who is looking for action. Although facebook is the social media which is most frequently mentioned, the other social media sites of MySpace, twitter and the like are also popular for people looking for hook-ups. There are also social media sites which are totally dedicated to hooking up for ‘discreet’ relations.

There are also those who use the social media sites to stalk their victim for other purposes. Rather than seeking to hook-up, they may be seeking revenge or something else. Old flames who were obsessive when you knew them may be looking for you or someone you know. People from your past that you wanted to burn bridges with may now be using the social media sites to reconstruct those old bridges.  Information concerning phone numbers addresses, job information are all readily available. It shocked me how easy it was to do such searches.

On a whim, I tested this out by looking up an old girlfriend. I was amazed at how I found her address, phone number, GPS coordinate, photos of her home, information on how many children she had, etc., etc. Such information may not lead to an affair, although embarrassing and  uncomfortable situation may arise from them. I also had the experience of old acquaintances posting photos that led to unpleasant question arise from social media. Sometimes, the uncomfortable situations and questions are more painful than an affair itself. In previous generations, past behaviors and acquaintances could be easily forgotten. With the internet, all the information is available depending on a persons ability to know where to look. This new power is a boon to suspicious spouses looking for evidence and also to wayward spouses looking for hook ups. This new power also means that people will need to be more discreet and realize that they never know who is looking over their shoulders.

Best Regards,

Jeffrey D. Murrah

affairs and facebook, Affairs in the News, facebook, facebook stalking, Reducing the Risk, stalking with social media, twitter

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!