How Media Normalizes Infidelity and What You Can Do About It

One of the most eye-opening responses I received recently was to an email asking, “Are you being groomed to cheat?” The flood of replies made it clear that this is a real concern for many of you. And after reflecting on it, I realized that this topic needs even more attention.

The grooming I’m talking about isn’t something you’d typically think of. It’s the ‘normalization’ of affairs — a slow, subtle influence that happens hour after hour on television and across other forms of media.

How Media Normalizes Affairs

Let’s start with the numbers. The average US adult spends 5 hours and 38 minutes a day watching television. Even if you’re only watching 3 hours, the constant depiction of affairs as ‘normal’ will wear you down eventually. At a subconscious level, your brain starts to absorb these messages, even if you think you’re just passively watching.

Have you noticed that in most television shows, couples who engage in infidelity rarely express any grief or regret? There’s no accountability, no sense of responsibility for their actions. They do it without remorse. What’s worse is that the characters face no real consequences for their behavior.

Your brain picks up on this, whether you realize it or not. Mirror neurons in your brain, which play a key role in learning and mimicking behavior, start to copy what you see on screen. The message is clear: It’s ‘normal’ to have an affair, and you shouldn’t feel guilty about it. This portrayal creates a disconnect between reality and fantasy.

This is nothing new. For decades, television has subtly shaped how we think. Back when I was in graduate school, I learned just how deeply TV programs impact your values and mindset. Shows like “The Brady Bunch” and “Julia” helped normalize blended families and single-parent households. Decades ago, those family configurations carried a social stigma, but today they’re widely accepted. The same thing is happening with infidelity now — cheating is being treated as routine and without consequence.

The Effects of Media Exposure on Your Mindset

By repeatedly showing affairs as no big deal, the media gradually softens your mind to accept infidelity as part of life. You begin to internalize the idea that it’s normal and acceptable, even if it contradicts your values.

And let’s not forget the effect of alcohol. Watching these shows while drinking wine or another drink can enhance the impact of the media’s messaging. It lowers your inhibitions, making it easier for the message to slip into your subconscious.

Why This Matters for Affair Recovery

Recovery from an affair isn’t just about ending the relationship. It’s about healing your mind and changing the way you think about infidelity. If you don’t address the mental conditioning you’ve been exposed to, you risk falling into an affair relapse.

You might think that simply ending the affair is enough, but the risk of slipping back into old patterns is high if you don’t also change the way you think. Affair recovery requires rewiring your thoughts about infidelity and the way it’s portrayed in the media.

In my video, “Overcoming Affair Relapse,” I talk about the mental shifts necessary to protect your relationship and prevent a relapse. It’s not just about stopping the affair — it’s about getting the affair out of your heart and mind.

Take Action Today

If you’ve been through an affair or want to safeguard your relationship, it’s time to take action. Click and download the video “Overcoming Affair Relapse” and start making the necessary changes to protect your relationship from future harm.