Being an amateur historian, there’s a part of me that marks annual and significant historic events. When those important dates occur, I feel their emotional pull, whether it be happy, sad or reflective.
I’ve dragged my family to historic sites like the Ring of Brodgar, Notre Dame, Goliad and Scone so that we could be there for important anniversary dates at those sites. Being at such sites on anniversaries makes it better.
Affair Anniversary Reactions also impacts your marriage. Even when affair happened years ago, the impact of their emotional tremor continue resonating on a yearly basis.
They’re always resonating. You just feel them stronger on the anniversary dates.
Anyone successful in the recovery community knows the power of anniversary reactions and the dangers they bring with them.
You and your spouse will both feel something on affair anniversaries. When D-Day (discovery day) and the day the affair ended come around, when the lover’s birthday rolls around and other key events. Knowing about these patterns will keep you from being blindsided by them.
Otherwise, feelings and thoughts about the affair will come up and your spouse may just think you’re obsessing about it. There may be other days as well, depending on what all happened during the affair.
Those annual cycles occur naturally. What’s not natural are your reactions to them.
When the anniversary still triggers crying spells, or sleeplessness or agitation, it’s telling you something. One the things your body is telling you is that there’s something about the affair that isn’t over.
There are issues still needing resolution.
Although your spouse may dismiss what you’re experiencing as ‘over reacting’ or you’re being overly dramatic about something that’s been put behind, I assure you there’s something to it.
Your emotions are real things. They are triggered by something going on in your heart or your head. You are not just ‘imagining’ things. Dismissing your reactions only leads to greater disconnection between you and your emotions.
Those anniversary reactions reveal areas still needing healing. Wounds they never heal need attention too. They linger because they’re deep. The anniversary reaction is your body’s way of bringing their unmet needs to your attention.
Many of such reactions have their roots in inadequate responses to relapse. Relapse Prevention is not only about keeping affairs from happening again, its’ also about breaking the cycle of affairs and your reactions to them.
If you’re wrestling with affair anniversary reactions, you need “Dealing With Affair Relapse“. The patterns and cycles you break, help finally close the door on those old affairs.
Knowing about the triggers and patterns help you master them rather than you being a victim of them. Click and download the video.
You can start healing rather than thinking something’s wrong with you when those anniversary reactions erupt. Your body remembers many things your mind may have blocked out.
Get healing rather than thinking something’s wrong with you.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
