If you have ever been to a baseball game or any other kind of sports you have likely asked yourself this question. Even in watching your child’s baseball game, when your team is behind, the kids are tired and the other team is just now picking up steam, increasing the margin of victory with each inning things appear hopeless. It grows even worse when your child’s team can’t seem to get an out and the other team goes through their batting order at least once every inning. You love your child, and you just want the game to end, if for no other reason than to put it out of its misery. At the end of such games you are relieved it is over and look forward to the next game, where there are still hopes that something will happen.
A similar thing happens in dealing with affairs. There comes a time that you will have to bring the badgering and resentments to an end. Like the innings that drag on for too long, there are times that the issues have drug on for too long and need to be rested. The game/argument needs to end (by the game, I am referring to the argument, NOT the marriage).
Any experienced sports player knows that when one game ends, you put it behind you and put your all into the next game. Likewise, there comes a time to let go of one issue and just start a new game. If you have been harping on one issue (e.g. a particular phone call, an odd e-mail address, or some other point of contention), you may need to let go of it, forgive and begin a new game/start with your spouse. Recall also it is about teamwork rather than trying to beat them or them beat you. Oftentimes with competitive spouses, the arguments become a game complete with score keeping, goals, and arguments with the officials. The main focus is to work things out with your spouse, not prove them wrong on every point. You want to restore the relationship and fellowship. One sure way to end the fellowship and harm the spirit of the marriage is to nag/lecture your spouse day after day about some issue related to the affair.
Game Over! Now take a break until the next game. Don’t keep playing the same loosing game over and over. If you keep replaying the game, you will keep getting the same results.
Best Regards,
Jeff Murrah
