In going through the daily news regarding affairs a recent item stood out. The item pointed out how on a recent episode of “Iyanla: Fix My Life” a husband revealed having extensive affairs.
Initially his wife thought her husband slept with eight woman. The truth was that he slept with 341 during the time of their relationship.
The two came to the life coach under the auspices of addressing his drinking problem. It was then the real problem of the infidelity came out.
(Given that addictions are often found together, this doesn’t surprise me.)
The wife was livid. She was aghast at the number of women. She was understandably upset. In dealing with her, the life coach, Iyanla repeatedly asked the wife the question “What difference does it make?”
If she recognized that what was going on was a sexual addiction, she’d have known that it does make a difference. The addict need the accountability that comes with coming clean about what he’s done.
There’s a BIG difference between sleeping with 8 and 341 women. The fact that he knows its 341 tells me that he’s keeping score. Although he denies he’s a sex addict, the numbers and patterns speak for themselves.
Apparently the husband doesn’t see being unfaithful that many times as indicative of a sexual addiction. It’s likely that he doesn’t fully understand what sexual addiction really is.
If the wife, husband or Iyanla had read my upcoming October report “Understanding the Dark World of Sexual Addiction and Affairs” they’d know more about what they are up against. They’d also know the importance of accountability in dealing with such an issue.
Handling sexual addictions is different than typical affairs. Treating them the same will have you treating the symptoms rather than the root cause of the affair. Dealing with the addiction also means that both of them have issues needing attention.
The October report “Understanding the Dark World of Sexual Addiction and Affairs” will be available to members of the Restored Lifestyle membership site as part of their membership. If you want to know more about this topic, you still have time to join.
Delaying dealing with these issues only gives them time to grow bigger.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
