When you’ve lived a few years, you see crazes come and go. One of the insane crazes that went around when I was a teenager consisted of carving the name of your girlfriend in your arm with pieces of a coke bottle.
I was never into pain, nor into cutting on myself. Although I wasn’t into it, I’ve met plenty of people who found it ‘enjoyable’. I viewed it as self-punishing.
Carving the name of some girl into my arm just didn’t appeal to me. They may have viewed it as a gesture of love and display of manliness, I saw it as foolish.
Then there’s the added dimension of how do you explain having someone’s name on you to others? It’s fine if its’ your wife, but at that age, I didn’t dare speculate on who that would be.
It wasn’t as lethal as eating tide pods, but it was by all definition a ‘craze’. Although I never engaged in it, several of my friends did. I often wonder how they explain those scars to their wives.
My guess is that it’s similar to you discovering the affair plus a new unwanted tattoo or scars on them. The affair was shocking enough, yet the new tattoo or scar is a permanent reminder of what they did.
They may even tell you “I don’t know how it got there.” In some cases, they may actually not be able to recall how it happened.
They may hide it or conceal it, hoping you don’t see it or ask about it. They know that there will be questions concerning it’s origin.
The unwanted tattoo or series of unwanted tattoos and scars indicate something else as well. They may be punishing themselves for what they did.
With unwanted tattoos, the affair is only the tip of the iceberg. There is something else much bigger going on.
In this case, it could be one of the warning signs of a love addiction going on. Ignoring it will bring more damage to your marriage. There’s likely meanings to that tattoo you never imagined.
In the October special report “Understanding the Dark World of Sexual Addiction and Affairs” for members of the ‘Restored Lifestyle’ site, I include the signs and problem of love addiction. If there are oddities like your spouse coming home with unwanted tattoos, you’ll want this report.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
