Many of the odd lessons I’ve learned in life concerns when significant events occur. In my life, I had the opportunity of seeing President Kennedy when he arrived at Houston’s Hobby Airport.
Being a little tyke, this was the first President I ever saw. Everyone told me that seeing him was an important thing, so I figured that it was.
Hearing the very next day about how he had been shot was a shock to me. I asked myself “The man I saw yesterday was shot?”
The only thing on the television was news coverage about what happened. I wondered what was so important that it interfered with my cartoons.
The odd lesson from going through that experience was that ‘it’s only after the event that you attach meaning to it’. I only understood afterwards what happened and the significance of it.
It was only after Kennedy’s death that people searched for the reasons it happened. Although it seems backwards, that’s the plain truth.
This odd lesson applies to affairs. It’s only after the affair that the reason for the affair is determined.
Think about it for a minute. “It’s only after the affair that the reason for the affair is determined”. Let the reality of that sink in, especially for those of you who think the cheater knows the reason for the affair ahead of it happening.
Both you and the cheater shape the determination of the reason. The affair happens, then the reason for it is determined, not the other way around.
Just knowing this odd truth shows you the importance of affair recovery. How you handle recovery from the affair makes a huge difference.
Part of handling the recovery involves sorting through the reasons behind the affair. It also helps having the input of others in seeing the affair from every angle.
This is why it would be helpful for you to join the support community at Restored Lifestyle. There, others can help you see things that you may have missed. You can then begin finding meanings for what happened.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
