While doing some research the other day, I saw a new affair industry which I’d not been aware of. I’m not sure how I overlooked it, or how I feel about it.
There are now sites and services devoted to removing information from the notorious She’s a Homewrecker site. Apparently there is a thriving business removing information about cheaters and their lovers.
On discovering this new industry, I wondered whether lovers should be publicly humiliated. This humiliation is a modern day banning of them from decent society.
The site plays no favorites. Lovers are exposed whether they are doctors, nurses, teachers, lawyers, realtors or salesmen. Those who depend on having good reputations with the public are now exposed to public ridicule.
Reputations are ruined with a short rant and photo.
Although I’m a huge privacy fan, when it comes to exposing affairs, public ridicule has been used for centuries in dealing with infidelity. I still have mixed feelings about that, yet can’t argue with the results. Ridicule and its accompanying shame have been around because they worked with some hard headed people.
She’s a homewrecker removes respect from lovers in a very public way. Even Tim Cook of Apple has his own version of shunning those who don’t share his values. He suggests that it’s a sin not to ban certain people from social media…
Although he doesn’t run the homewrecker site, they share a common vision of banning people. They both use banning, they just have different ways of doing it. In Tim’s case, he wants to ban those whose values are not in line with his.
With She’s a Homewrecker, banning shows up in the form of public shaming.
In the past, a lover’s reputation would be ruined at their church and within their local community. In my mind, ruining reputations is merely another way of banning them from ‘decent folk’. They aren’t allowed a place in decent society that’s free from discomfort.
Although shunning and banning may help you feel a little better at having expressed your feelings, it focuses on the symptom rather than the root problem. It’s a temporary fix at best.
Then there’s always the vindictive types that use such sites for making attacks whether or not anything actually happened. It’s definitely a reputation killer.
When you’re ready for addressing the real problems behind the affair rather than just unleashing on the lover, consider joining the Restored Lifestyle membership site. There you’ll find the answers and direction you need in making real change in your marriage.
Attacking the lover won’t bring your spouse back, no matter how much relief you experience in doing so. You’re not dealing with the root cause of the affair.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
