One of the actions of the ‘woke’ movement concerns language. Those in the movement know that the words you use shape your thinking. When you change how you talk about something, it changes how you think about it.
One area where this is apparent is with affairs. When a majority of the culture shifted from talking about infidelity to cheating, they lost clarity about what they were talking about.
It’s not just a word change, it changes how you think about adultery. It’s societal programming.
This point struck me when a reader asked the question, “Are dating profiles cheating?” She discovered her husband was creating dating profiles and wanted to know if it should be considered ‘cheating’.
In changing the language of the relationship from ‘infidelity’ to ‘cheating’ it sound less harsh, it also creates confusion and conflicts. Something gets lost in this change. It makes it harder to discuss issues of fidelity and loyalty.
Creating a dating profile is a clear violation of loyalty and fidelity. The person creating the profile is being disloyal to their spouse. Their fidelity is no longer limited to one person.
Although the distinction is clear when you call infidelity what it is. By changing the term to cheating, you create debates about dating profiles, petting, chatting and sending suggestive photos.
Many of those acts don’t constitute you actually consummating a relationship with the lover, yet they are ALL acts of infidelity. The cheater is mentally engaging in or proposing an affair. In all likelihood, they’re engaging in a fantasy affair.
They have the intention of unlawful carnal knowledge in their heart and head, even if they haven’t done so physically. At the least, they’ve withdrawn their love, affection and attention from you.
If dating profiles have become an issue in your marriage, there are definite problems needing attention. The longer the problems go on, the greater the risk of things worsening.
One of the problems going on is a lack of connection when it comes to communication. The two of you may be talking at each other, but something is definitely missing. The two of you aren’t talking about each of your needs and finding better ways of meeting them.
In my “30 Days to a Better Marriage” program, I share with you incremental ways of changing the direction your marriage is going. Each day you’ll receive direction as to what needs changing that day.
Day by day as you follow the directions, your marriage starts changing. Now is the time to start changing the direction of things before the dating profiles, chatting and photos lead to something else.
Click and order the program to start transforming your marriage today.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
