A reader wanted to know, “Can leading a double life cause stress?” The simple answer is “Yes!” I’d also add that stress is the least of your problems with leading a double life.

Leading a double life amounts to living a lie. The longer you live a lie, the greater the damage done. It damages the trust people have in you. They never know what to believe. This double life amounts to living real life part-time and living a lie part-time.

Not only do people lose trust in you, but leading a double life also damages your reputation. Once your reputation is soiled enough, others will have less and less to do with you.

Anytime they interact with you, they’re never sure about the ‘real you.’ The longer you live your double life, the greater the likelihood you will experience trouble with your thinking.

It becomes increasingly difficult to maintain two separate lives, whether it’s about two sides of you or to the extreme of having two separate families and lives to go with it.

You can maintain the charade for a while. Although you may have a secret side of your life, taking it to the level of complete double lives is taxing. The amount of mental and emotional energy required to keep your double life going grows exponentially. Each life will want greater commitment from you in terms of time, money, and emotional investment.

Eventually, you’ll love one and hate the other. The priorities you have with each life will compete. In your mind, you compartmentalize and think the lines are clear.

The reality is that the two lives will bleed through into each other. One eventually wins out over the other one. Continuing the two lives also makes you more vulnerable to believing lies as well.

You’ve been existing on lies and start losing the ability to know the truth from a lie. It also puts you at greater risk for an affair.

Instead of trying your luck at a double life, consider healing your life, marriage, and emotions now. In the video, “Help for the Cheater: Starting the Road to Recovery”, I deal with making the important changes for turning your life around.

Rather than continuing on the merry-go-round of insecurity and more lies, start taking steps that bring healing and affair recovery.

Keeping It Real,

Jeff

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