The day that cheating is discovered devastates you! Even with terms like D-Day, Hiroshima, Nagasaki, Armageddon, 9/11 etc. are used, they don’t fully convey the destruction you feel.
With that shocking news, you realize that your life is suddenly changed and blown away. The news rips away your past, present and future. You are suddenly dragged into a new world of pain.
In a similar vein, when people viewed the horror of World War I, they had no word to describe the devastation and destruction. Some thinkers seriously considered trying to invent a new language and a new way of expressing things.
They wanted to go back to the beginnings and try to start over. They felt that the world needed to reconsider what they had done. Such was the start of the Dada art movement.
Those artists only began to grapple with the sense of destruction that you feel. You, like them wish you could start over. You need to begin again, but do not know where to start.
Finding out about horrid diseases such as cancer is bad news, but at least you have a past that you can rely on. With news of cheating, you wonder if anything that you shared with your spouse was real and not a lie. Every time they came home late or was out of town, suddenly becomes causes of suspicion.
You rethink every moment wondering what was real and what was not. You suddenly realize that you can not trust your own senses and that the world you lived in is suddenly gone.
The joy of life is ripped from you and now each day is a drudgery. Life becomes something to be endured rather than enjoyed. Zombies have more life than you do on most days.
To make matters worse, you lost your best friend who helped you in the past. They can no longer be counted on. You have to face an emotionally bombed out world —ALONE! It’s dreadful thinking of staying there, it’s dreadful moving forward, it’s dreadful thinking of going back. You are stuck in emotional limbo.
The famous picture of the scream suddenly makes a lot of sense.
There is hope! First you need to breathe. Breathe again. Breathe again. Find a safe place and safe friends. Then breathe! You will may it through this, even when you feel like you won’t.
When you need help making it through your day, or knowing what to do, we are here. The Affair Recovery Workshop guides you in doing what’s needed to handle what just hit you.
When you feel lost, it guides you through what to say, how to say it and preparing you for what comes next.
Best Regards,
Jeff
