If you are the cheater, you may have attempted excusing what happened based on your intentions. You may have told your spouse that you ‘never intended’ for this to happen. Or that you never intended for it to happen this way. When you say such things you are asking them to excuse your actions based on your ‘intentions’. There may be some affairs that occur innocently, although my experience is that you likely intended for something to happen. You did not meet your lover without intentions. You would not have agreed to meet or even contact them if you had ‘no’ intentions. It could be that what you intended was revised, or that the flirting got out of hand.
You may have tried to excuse the affair, claiming ‘nothing happened’. Nothing may have happened, although in setting up a meeting with the lover, you had intentions of something happening. You may think that you are clever by hiding all the evidence. Although the evidence is gone, the intention remains.
When in comes to clearing things up, you will need to deal with the intention as well as the actions.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
