Some jobs actually encourage adultery. Infidelity is not only tolerated, it is expected and encouraged. Such a job setting may sound too bizarre to be true, yet the reality is, they do exist. Growing up in the Pasadena area, there were many industrial plants where infidelity was rampant. It was not uncommon for workers on another shift to be servicing spouses who were home alone. This pattern also occurs in corporate settings in the form of workplace wives or workplace husbands. These are co-workers with whom the cheater has an on-going affair with, yet the boss and others say nothing since they do not want to rock the boat. In such cases, all the co-workers know what is going on, yet the practice is tolerated and encouraged. Those out of town trips become more productive when there is a workplace spouse that goes along as well. Another place where this happens on occasion is the military. Some commanders subscribe to the old saying that “soldiers who do not fool around will not fight”. The saying has poisoned many military units. History shows that that statement is not true, yet enough cheaters have served to provide some surface validity to make the saying sound true. Although ‘officially’ affairs are discouraged, if you or your spouse serve under a commander who subscribes to such a mindset, what actually occurs is very different than the official policy. It is important to look at what is supported or condoned rather than what the ‘official’ policy is stated.
When you are in a job situation where adultery is encouraged, you may be able to resist it at first. Over time, such environments often wear people down, including you or your spouse. When the stress increases, the risk of affairs increases as well. Despite all the good intentions, trying to work in an environment pushing adultery under high stress often pushes many people to their breaking point. The ability to resist the affair weakens over time. Under high stress, people look for quick and easy ways to reduce their stress, and affairs are often one of the ways that is not only encouraged, it is often rewarded as well. If your spouse works in such an environment, you need to listen to them talking about being stressed seriously. Ignoring their stress may be all it takes to push them in a direction you do not want them or yourself to go.
This does not mean that I condone such adultery, I do not. I do understand the immense pressure that exists in such environments, whether in police departments, corporate offices, plants or military units. The pressure is real. Those who are in high-risk situations where life and death are often on the line often look at life and choices differently than others do. You will need to be aware of that.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
4 Responses
This is true. The problem is when the spouse is unwilling to prepare themselves to deflect this …the Bible tells us up front that we need to ‘put on the whole armour of God….this is to be thinking as GOD does and has offered to us to learn and ‘put on’ in our way of seeing things.
Unfortunately people even in the churches are missing this exhortation …they do not ‘arm ‘ themselves with the Word to make their decisions.
What goes into our bellies does not defile us but what comes OUT of the heart …We are told to put the WORD on in our mind/ heart because ‘out of the heart come the ISSUES of LIFE”
In business where the love of money is the whole point ..as the word says it is not money that is the ‘root’ of all evil …it is the “LOVE of MONEY” that is the root of all evil
In business nothing wrong with earning an honest wage….but as you said …some venues encourage immorality and it is like a LEAVEN that grows within people and among people who are around it and do not deal with it by way of the WORD …the FEAR of GOD is the BEGINNING of wisdom
So sad …it is a indeed a jungle out there.
The way women ‘work ‘ this in the work place and men who often grow up without learning how drooling over women not their wives is a form of ‘laying down their manhood’ when they allow themselves to devalue themSELVES by lusting after women who flirt with them’
The women think it is just ‘fun’ perhaps but men are vulnerable to this …and men who flirt with women as well are stumbling blocks to women who are feeling the need for compliments .
What a mess…..I had one woman who was NOT romantically involved with my husband but was his assistant even as he had his ‘adulteress ‘ as he had hired her after they started their adultery ..as his business partner …the other woman we have known for years and she said that she was his ‘office wife’ to me one time …just joking …not realizing [I think] that my husband’s business partner was actually functioning this way
The phrase still OFFENDED me at the time , even though she was joking …I feel this type of denigration of the wife and marriage is also a violation that satan works to destroy peoples attitudes about the very holy covenant relationship that is marriage
Everyone LOSES with this sort of mockery!
Zaza,
Your perceptions are correct. Many couples are too busy earning a living, having fun, etc. to know how to protect themselves. The lifestyles currently in vogue often weaken the family, while accelerating riches. For many couples, it is as if they are giving up a healthy family life and marriage in exchange for financial security. That is not a good trade off, yet many are willing to do it.
In reference to the armor of God, I was just telling my son about a Virginia General named Thomas J. Jackson who would pray the armor of God as he put on his uniform. His critics often mocked his serious religious ways, yet his marriage was strong and his track record as a general was phenomenal.
Cool….would that every man going out into the world would do that as he put on his suit …and every woman too.
The helmet of salvation is usually something folks think of as a one time event…..the breast plate of righteousness is nonexistent without regard for the ‘instruction in righteousness ‘ that is contain in ‘all scripture’ as 2 Tim 3:16 and 17 17 pronounce
The feet SHOD with the GOSPEL of peace so we do not wander into enemy territory without a clue,…and the loins girt about with truth so we do not get deceived by the vast variety of deceitful charms of the enemy of our souls..
The shield of faith which empowers us as we implement the sword of the spirit which is the WORD of GOD rightly divided …so necessary to divide asunder the thoughts and intentions of the heart …so we can KNOW our own hearts ..and the hearts of those who come through our lives with testimonies both true and false but without this SWORD who can tell ?
We lose sight and respect for the crafty ways the enemy can and does deceive when the sword lays inactive waiting someone to obediently attend …open it …making it our first thing…first.
So it is many go out daily unarmed …and no threat to the deceiver of our souls…their own minds ill equipped to recognize that deceit found in our own hearts…if not exposed to us by the WORDS of GOD enlightening our eyes…
Shoot the devil does not have to work too hard when those who claim His name don’t put on that WORD daily to have it IN them so it may WORK in them to will and to do of HIS good pleasure in all our interactions with others and within our own minds
What a great idea…putting on the armour of GOD with remembrance of what it IS as one dresses the body for the day …Good story Jeff! Thanks!
Zaza,
I am glad that you enjoyed the story. It always stuck with me. The image of him doing that before each battle stands out in my mind. If we had men and women that did that today, there would be a big difference in marriages.