Dealing with affairs at times hits on the issue of honor. You may have asked “What is the honorable thing to do?” or “What is the right thing to do?”. You may be asking this of yourself or of the cheater. The honor question is often a two-edged sword. Your relationship with the cheater may have been less than honorable, yet now you want them to ‘do the right thing’ or ‘do the honorable thing’. It is hard to get them to do such things when the relationship has not been based on honor or doing right. If, on the other hand, it has been based on doing the right thing, the honor question is a realistic concern.
If you have not been doing things honorably, then honor is dead, if you have, then you can make appeals to decency, doing the right thing, etc.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
4 Responses
That is beyond some people’s ability since to violate the most intimate relationship of a lifetime requires that one has no honor nor any idea of what that entails.
Zaza,
You are correct about how when the marriage is violated, it requires that a person not have honor anyway in most cases. I was allowing for some situations where there may have been ‘unusual’ circumstances. Although they are rare, they do happen. Even though there are already violations of honor, many couples continue wanting to play the honor card in their arguments. There are also situations where the couple are just shacking up, yet want honor or people to ‘act like adults’ when cheating occurs.
These days it is a big assumption that couples do the honorable thing and marry each other. Some have not even taken that step, yet they want to talk about honor, loyalty and commitment.
TV show often display the ‘hero’ as a great and ‘honorable ‘ guy while he is sexually immoral….even some shows like leverage demonstrate criminals as the hero’s like Robin Hood who are the ‘true defenders’ of justice as they use their ‘skills’ to right wrongs
People have no way to determine what is right …even as GOD told us ..
Isa 5:20 Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!
Ecc 9:1 For all this I considered in my heart even to declare all this, that the righteous, and the wise, and their works, [are] in the hand of God: NO MAN KNOWETH EITHER LOVE OR HATRED BY ALL THAT IS BEFORE THEM..
Why ? because to know what LOVE IS one must know HE who IS LOVE…and without that …there is no way for them to determine the difference\
God’s knowledge and identification of these is NOT the same as man’s
Isa 55:8 For my thoughts [are] not your thoughts, neither [are] your ways my ways, saith the LORD.
Isa 55:9 For [as] the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.
.1Jo 4:8 He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.
Rom 13:10 Love worketh NO ill to his neighbour: therefore love [is] the fulfilling of the law.
Your spouse is your closest “NEIGHBOR” therefore if one can commit the sin of adultery which contains many other sins….lying ,stealing , coveting ..IDOLATRY ..against one’s spouse in the name of ‘love’ …they are deceived and KNOW NOT LOVE and KNOW NOT GOD who is the LORD and they are in deep DOO DOO!!!
Zaza,
The media (television, films and music) often go out of their way not just to show faults or have heroes with clay feet, they amplify the immoral aspects. There is a reason why they do remakes of Robin Hood, the Musketeers, etc. They mold the hero to fit the prevailing values and themes of the day. I suspect that is why Hollywood is in the process of re-doing the stories of Noah and Moses even as we speak. I know that the Hollywood version will certainly be more lurid, lascivious and immoral than the actual people are.
All this is part of an attempt to change the morals and values of people (along with justifying their own). It is little wonder we have so much adultery now, after this generation grew up with the sexualized heroes and heroines that Hollywood gave us.