Being robbed of your possessions at gunpoint is a traumatic ordeal. When someone uses force or the threat of force tin taking what belongs to you, it leaves you feeling violated.
In much the same way, when someone steals the affections of your spouse it’s a form of theft. When they force the relationship on you along with pressuring you to either accept or tolerate it, you’re being robbed.
You’re not only being robbed of your spouse’s affections, you’re being robbed of your dignity and your peace of mind. The affair is forced upon you with the options being dictated to you rather than you making choices in the matter.
Even though the cheater excuses what is going on, and thinks you’re overreacting, what they did is a form of theft. It’s not accidental that someone dating your spouse is called a “man-stealer” in some circles (and yes, the term ‘woman-stealer’ is used as well. The singer Joe Tex sang a song about it).
What makes matters worse is that modern society has grown so accustomed to stealing and theft of spouses, there’s little outcry. The proliferation of affairs has weakened the moral fiber of many communities.
Places that at one time ostracized cheaters now welcome them. Places that once spoke out against adultery now tolerate the behavior.
When cheating and adultery are supported by the community and community leaders, it leaves you feeling alone in standing against it. There may not even be many people that agree with you that adultery is wrong, much less that they are sinning in a major way.
The proliferation has robbed communities of moral outrage against such immoral behavior.
You’ve been robbed of your spouse and many communities and nations have had their conscience seared and their moral compass broken by the tide of infidelity. Although you may be alone, it does not mean that your situation is helpless. It does not mean the battle is un-winnable.
Moving past the shock means facing the truth of the trauma that happened. Rather than run from it or downplay it, you need to deal with it. When the trauma is only half-dealt with, it’s still there.
One resource for this is the video “Overcoming Affair Trauma“. You can be moving through recovery and healing rather than avoiding it.
Best Regards,
Jeff
