As you work through the issues of the affair, there will be tension in your home. This tension is a natural result of you and your
spouse making efforts at being honest. When you start being honest, it has a way of changing things. During the change, there will be tension. The tension amounts to old ways of behaving and thinking not wanting to let go. It is an attempt to return to the way things were. Although it may sound romantic to go back to the ‘way we were’, the reality is that it was unhealthy and dysfunctional. The way you were is part of what led to the affair. You do not want to go back there. You want a BETTER relationship. You want a BETTER marriage. Going back amounts to settling for leftovers. You want the best, not what is tolerable.
The tension, although unpleasant is part of the growth process. It will not last forever. It does not have to be a permanent fixture in your home. Change often brings discomfort that comes from being in unfamiliar territory in your marriage relationship.
Best Regards,
Jeff Murrah
