What the Machine can teach you about bad news

Bad news sucks the energy from you. Even when you haven’t strained or exerted yourself, on hearing bad news, you suddenly feel drained.

Although in the movie, The Princess Bride, the hero has life sucked out of him, by ‘the machine’. In real life, bad news acts like ‘the machine’ in that movie.

There have been times when hearing bad news took away my motivation. The bad news left me de-motivated.

Whatever enthusiasm I had prior to the news disappears. The bad news has a wilting effect on my enthusiasm.

Not only does the enthusiasm fade, there’s also the sensation of going into a black hole and not knowing when and if I’ll get out the other side. During those times, I need hope.

It’s during those times that an encouraging word from a good friend or close family members makes a world of difference. Those little cards or calls really help. In my case, the more heartfelt the encouraging words, the greater the impact.

Bad news tests you. It tests the strength of your relationship. A reader recently wrote that her husband doesn’t want to work on things. She hoped that he would give it a try.

On hearing the news, her response is one of giving up on their marriage.

I understand her response. It’s hard keeping on in the midst of bad news. In fact, the hardest struggle is the day to day continuation of activities.

Giving up when you’re highly emotional is never a good idea. Your emotions are triggered by reactions to the immediate. In this case, the immediate reactions to bad news.

In my mind, a good place to start in dealing with such bad news situations where a spouse doesn’t want to work on your marriage is giving it at least six months. That time frame provides better emotional stability for decision making.

If you’ve given your situation time and you’re still discouraged, you could be dealing with Affair Trauma. In that case, you’ll want to consider the video “Overcoming Affair Trauma” which guides you in moving past that point.

The life draining effects of the Machine were eventually overcame. Overcoming them required effort and commitment. The bad news eventually comes to an end, along with its life sucking effects.

Best Regards,

Jeff