While recovering from the affair, you’ll find yourself facing many challenging situations. One of those challenges that comes with affairs is adult temper tantrums.
Temper tantrums are bad enough when they’re coming from children. When adults have temper tantrums, it’s both pathetic and dangerous.
When adults have such tantrums, they’re likely in a state of blind raging anger. They aren’t thinking through things. What thinking they’ve done has only worked them up into a tizzy.
They want what they want, the way they want it and when they want it!
When you or your spouse are having a tantrum, it’s time for calling in outside help. At that point, reason, logic, compromise and making appeals don’t work.
When in the midst of a tantrum or rage, their brain isn’t processing information. It’s not capable of processing since it believes there is a threat.
You can talk to them, yet their brain isn’t processing any new information. You need to realize that at that point safety is a concern.
Waiting until it’s too late for calling in help is a mistake you can’t afford to make. Calling in outside help means bringing in a physician, counselor, neutral third party or even calling the police.
The person having a tantrum doesn’t want to stop, so they will not want the outside help being brought in. You need the help for your own safety. They may not want it, yet when in the middle of rage, they need it.
When they start making threats or brandishing weapons, it’s a sure sign that outside help is needed. When your safety is at risk, action is needed. Worrying about money or security are not so important when your life and health are endangered.
Once the danger is over, start seeking help. Consider joining the Restored Lifestyle site for guidance in helping you through the affair in areas like affair relapse, overcoming trauma reactions and knowing how to initiate constructive communication safely.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
