A couple of years ago it flooded in the part of Texas where I live. It’s earned the nickname as ‘flash flood alley’.
There were several areas around me where the bridges were washed away. In each location, signs were posted along with flashing lights alerting drivers to the danger ahead.
Typically, the largest warning sign is right before you reach where the bridge is out. Although steps are taken that hinder your ability of reaching the damaged bridge, including blocking the road, some drivers go around past the blockades and drive on.
When it comes to affairs, there are also blockages and warning signs. These warnings alert you to dangerous conditions ahead.
When cheaters ignore the roadblocks and go around and drive on, there’s a HUGE warning sign right before they reach the danger. That warning sign is when the cheater tells the lover they are married and the lover responds with the attitude of “It doesn’t matter.”
That little phrase of “it doesn’t matter” is a flashing warning sign of huge trouble ahead. It also alerts you to a dangerous attitude that doesn’t respect boundaries of any sorts. They’re not about to curb their sexual appetite.
They don’t care that the cheater’s married, has kids or their reputation. The usual relationship barriers don’t stop them.
With the remark, “It doesn’t matter”, they make it clear that any appeal for decency, morality or doing the right thing is wasted on them. They don’t care about your marriage, your reputation, your health. All that matters is their own appetites.
It’s tantamount to the reported inscription above hell’s gateway proclaiming “Abandon hope all who enter here“.
If the lover was honest, they would say announce that they don’t play by any accepted rules. In their mind, the normal rules don’t apply to them. Such persons don’t respect the cheater and they certainly don’t respect you or requests any of you make of them.
This means when you tell the lover, ‘it’s over’, they aren’t going to respect those boundaries either. Such persons are not easily removed from your life. Such lovers don’t go quietly and won’t leave your spouse easily.
It’s situations like that where the video, “Dealing with Affair Trauma” helps you heal after all you’ve been through. Although you didn’t have the affair, you may be the one carrying many of the symptoms and stress from confronting it.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
