Although common sense instructs you not to have an affair at work, it continues happening. At times I wonder if the warning about not having sexual relations where you work needs to be required posting like the OSHA posters are.
My suspicion is that such a poster would get about as much attention as the OSHA poster or the requirement that employees must wash their hands before returning to work. Although these items are posted in order to protect employees, they aren’t often viewed that way.
In a similar manner the warning about affairs at work also protects employees and their families, yet such a warning would be viewed as ‘meddling in their private lives’.
I was reminded of this when a reader wrote “My husband had an affair with a coworker at a factory and he still works with her just not same department.”
Once the affair happens, its’ way past time for warnings. At that point, it’s about damage control.
Continuing working with people puts stress on the cheater at work and the betrayed at home. It puts added pressure on an already volatile situation.
Even though the lover is in another department or part of the plant, it does little in terms of making the situation better. Continuing working with the lover adds stress to everyone.
The feelings are still there. The risk is still there.
The choice of sleeping where they work makes the situation more frustrating for everyone concerned, along with creating tensions in the work place. What was considered ‘their business’ is now everybody’s business.
The added tensions in the workplace increase the dangers to everyone. When coworkers are focused on relationships rather than their work, everything suffers.
Those working with them now have to deal with added tensions along with unwholesome reputations. once your reputation is ruined at work, it sticks around for a while.
I’ve dealt with the dangers of affairs in the workplace in some previous posts. The workplace is now a high-risk environment. How are people who can’t handle temptations at work now suddenly able to handle the fallout from the affair?
This means that issues like boundaries and communication are more critical than they were before. If you think that a few phone calls and talks will smooth things over, you’re fooling yourself. You need more intensive communication than that.
If that’s all your doing, it’s only going to be a matter of time before things blow up again.
If you don’t have a clue about what kind of communication is needed or what boundaries are needed, then you need the video “Help for the Cheater: Starting the Road to Recovery”.
The video guides the cheater through the hurdles that come with ending the affair and starting the affair recovery process.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
