In the event that you and your spouse aren’t able to recover from the affair, you may find yourself single again. Being single again has its share of challenges and issues.
Modern culture reacts to adults being single after they had been married. That reaction is often unwelcoming of your new status. There may be divorce parties, but soon afterwards comes the pressure.
It’s as if the world wants you to hurry up and marry again. I was reminded of this when I recently talked with the single widow woman down the street.
Soon after her husband passed away, one of the more frequent questions asked of her concerned whether she would marry again or not. She hadn’t even worked through her grief yet and those surrounding her wanted to know her marriage plans.
Talk about unrealistic expectations!
Those of you who are facing that situation can identify with her experience. In dealing with such issues, I encourage you to work through your own grief first. If you don’t you increase the likelihood of picking another loser situation.
One reason for this is that you will gravitate to relationship dynamics that feel familiar. Since the relationship you were just in had some unhealthy dynamics, you’ll want to make some changes before jumping into relationships again.
This is a situation where it’s important for you to resist peer pressure when it comes to pairing you up with someone prematurely. Going from one catastrophe to another isn’t a good idea.
There are patterns and habits you’ve picked up along the way that may need tweaking. In terms of tweaking, I’m referring to making them better.
One hurdle you will face is that of being able to trust others again. That takes some work. It’s not impossible, but it doesn’t come without effort.
This is why I recommend the video “How Can I Trust You Again?” in such situations. It guides you in developing healthy trust. When you have a healthy form of trust, it leaves you in a stronger place for relationships.
Just click and download the video. In minutes you have direction that helps you improve your view of yourself and others.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
