Over the past few years, you’ve likely heard about the Harvey Weinstein story along with many other celebrity seducers. Each day, new accusations arise along with accounts of how others remained silent about what happened to them.
I’m not shocked at what he did. The surprise is how wide spread was the impact of him and others like him. Those victimized and threatened now struggle with the impact of trauma.
Movies are designed to have you identify with some of the characters. With that in mind, hearing of their real life traumas, such as details of what some abuser did triggers some identification regarding the traumas.
At times the public wonders why the victims of trauma don’t speak out. Those who haven’t gone through such trauma don’t understand the big picture.
When you’ve been traumatized, it changes you and your brain. One of the effects is that you lose your courage. Toughness is about surviving, not thriving. Victims aren’t taught how to break free from what they’re enduring. They aren’t given the tools needed for their healing.
Feelings of shame and self-loathing take over. Fears of abandonment and anxiety fill your heart and mind. You may even experience a racing heart, breathing difficulties, stomach pains and intestinal ailments.
You have the choice of making the symptoms worse by speaking out concerning what happened or keeping your symptoms under control, self-preservation becomes very important. Just speaking out triggers emotions as if reliving the incident.
When your career or life are threatened by powerful people, you bury the trauma deep inside. It’s easier thinking something is wrong with you rather than question the wrongness of what was done to you or what your spouse did.
Those changes brought on by the trauma don’t go away on their own. The longer you keep them buried, the more long term damage they do. They’re like a dormant volcano, eventually your emotions are going to explode.
Hearing about your spouse’s affair may trigger old traumas in your life. Traumas have a way of connecting with each other.
One triggers the other. Your mind searches your memory banks for similar feelings and how to cope. If you’ve had previous traumas, it’s likely that your mind will do what it did before.
As you can see, trauma is a powerful force. It’s something to be respected and not ignored.
This is where the video “Overcoming Affair Trauma” can help you. If you’ve stuffed your reactions, you can learn ways of moving past them. Those effects, even from years ago, can keep you stuck.
The good news is that you don’t have to stay stuck in the trauma. You can move past it. Since your mind is stuck, it may take several viewings before your mind clears up. That’s okay. Recovering from traumas and affairs are messy.
Although you want to be in control of your life, letting fears of mess keep you from healing only makes things worse. Getting relief is well worth some temporary messiness.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
