Do you enjoy a periodic garage or estate sale? I know I do. The thrill of finding some a ‘great deal’ or something highly unusual makes them fun. There are some sales that are a paradise for bargain hunters and others that are just looking to make a few bucks peddling their junk.
There are days when I wonder if the field of marriage and family therapy has been sold at a discount in a Saturday morning garage sale to special interest groups. When I see ‘experts’ touting ‘recently discovered’ genders or new family structures or some other trendy item uncovered, I am skeptical. Did they really find something that never existed in the past thousands of years man has inhabited the earth?
Has science advanced so fast that the genetic code is creating new combinations that previous generations never knew? Is there really a new family structure that has never existed before?
Are these actually new discoveries or the latest pet project of the editors of the research journals and their agendas to remake the family and marriage?
I like to look ‘under the hood’ of the research and see what these ‘experts’ are basing their claims on. In many of the items being promoted by the likes of Huffington Post and other pop culture media outlets, I find a lot of junk science being pushed onto the public.
When any discovery is based on the survey findings of 200-300 college students in some college towns, I have some questions. I know college towns can get weird, but are they really creating something new? I wonder if the researcher was cherry-picking their results or if the students in that college were sober when they participated in the study.
You also have to consider that many college students are fresh out of the public schools where some were indoctrinated rather than educated. This amounts to them being programmed in their responses. It makes you wonder if you can trust what they say.
Given today’s college campus mindsets, it’s hard trusting anything coming from research done on students.
Since many universities pay students to be subjects, there is an inclination to do or say whatever since they are getting paid to do it. If I want around asking college students to say or do something weird and pay them for it, there would definitely be some takers for my offer.
In many cases, researchers find something interesting enough to get their research published or give them some press exposure, yet not findings that can be easily replicated.
Although science takes a different approach to knowledge, the scientific method requires repeatability before it can be considered valid. If one scientist comes up with some unusual claims, but other scientists are not able to do the same thing, then something isn’t right.
I came across the term new term, CNM (Consensual Non-Monogamous) relationships. Some professor touts this category as a new finding. I suspect the agenda behind such findings is making these people feel ‘normal’ and mainstream.
When you mainstream affairs and philandering, you remove any special status your marriage has. It reduces marriage to ‘serial one-night stands’ or a return to days of concubines. (Perhaps concubines were the CNM’s of an earlier historical epoch).
When your marriage is marred by an affair, you have choices. You can choose to accept the affair as ‘normal’ and mainstream OR you can reject that idea and fight for your marriage. Mainstreaming the latest trendy behavior is not going to remove the guilt or hurt from the affair. It only serves as a way the cheater avoids guilt or wrongdoing.
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Keeping It Real,
Jeff
