Recently I have been hearing more accounts of marriages being under attack. The latest attack surprised me when it was initially brought to my attention. At that time I initially viewed it as a passing phase, yet it continued longer than most trendy things.
The threat I am talking about is what I call “Tik-Tok World”. Although many people can view the videos and be unfazed, some spouses don’t seem to be able to break free from the influence of ‘Tik-Tok World’. They are mesmerized by the images and presentations. While in that mesmerized state, they are vulnerable to suggestions. At that point, the mesmerized spouse loses track of time and awareness of what is going on around them. They may even believe what is told to them in “Tik-Tok world” over what their own spouse tells them.
When your spouse is in the state of being open to suggestions, they are exposing their mind to influences that often run contrary to putting their relationship with you as a priority. The problem has grown to the point, some spouses need to disconnect from the app to regain their clear thinking.
The phenomenon bothered me in that I see similar trance-like states with those struggling with porn addictions. I am not saying that Tik-Tok is porn. I am saying that porn addicts and those caught up in ‘Tik-Tok World’ show some similarities in how they are zoned out during the time they are consuming the media.
Not only that, Tik-Tok world steals your time and attention from your spouse. When you start watching the videos you may intend to only be there a short while, yet the next time you check the time, 45 minutes have gone by.
What I can tell you is that those spouses need a connection with you. They need real conversations with their spouse. This means you need to reach out to them and lift them up out of their stupor. In the video, Hurting People, Healing Questions, I address ways of improving communication with your spouse.
If you are unsure where to start or what to talk about, then this video is for you. In pulling your spouse out of that world, they need to connect with your heart. It is only those heart-to-heart conversations and connections that are powerful enough to overcome the pull and propaganda of the Tik-Tok World.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
