A commonly asked question that challenges many with its answer is “Can a person be driven to an affair?” In emotionally unhealthy marriages, spouses often find themselves feeling desperate in finding ways to meet their needs. The needs are legitimate. There is nothing wrong with the needs. What becomes problematic is when they see the affair as a way to meet those needs. When spouses can not talk through their issues or do not have the freedom to bring up their issues with their partner, the likelihood of an affair is greater.
This means you need to be approachable. You will need to listen to your spouse. In listening to them, you will need to hear them out, rather than react. By hearing them out, you are demonstrating your willingness to be open. Spouses often know that “talk is cheap”, and that their partners often promises, but does not deliver. In an effort to be a spouse that delivers on their word, listen to your partner’s concerns. Let them talk WITHOUT correcting them or talking down to them, at least until they have finished telling your their concerns. I have seen many spouses focused more on correcting their partners than listening to them and the results are disasterous.
