One of the ways the trauma of an affair impact peoples lives is the “disconnection with life.” Although there is an alienation between you and your spouse, the alienation does not stop there. It often spreads to where you pull away from friends, activities, emotions, your body, self-care, spirituality, mental stimulation and in some cases from living itself. Like a cancer, the disconnection spreads through one’s life, impacting every area of life. Once the decision is made to heal and forgive, it can be a struggle to ‘reconnect with life’. Although the disconnection often occurs quickly, the reconnection takes longer. The reconnection is often a process. It is important to keep this in mind, since in modern society there is an obsession with “I want it NOW”. Healing and reconnecting does not occur on demand. In a way similar to the healing of the human body, the healing of the human soul needs time to reconnect all the relationships, memories, emotions, etc. At first the reconnection is weak. As it is exercised, it becomes stronger.
How long does reconnection take? The time it takes to reconnect often varies from person to person. Given that it often takes 6-18 months for a person to recover from a major loss as in a death, the 6-18 month figure is a firgure that provides a reference point.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
