Affairs and violence often go together like peanut butter and jelly. The same unbridled passions which make the affair so exciting is also the same neural circuitry which makes unbridled anger with its associated violence more intense as well. Although people often accept that with affairs that there is a danger of jealous spouses. There is also an increased danger of jealous lovers, there is an increased danger of stalking, and associated violence.
Lovers often spend hours fantasizing about the affair, but do not consider the other associated behaviors. Few if any lovers fantasize about being beat up, dealing with lawyers, fighting for custody in court and legal involvement related to the affair. These details are often minimized and disregarded. Although often avoided, such details are every much a part of the affair scenario as the passionate love.
A pastor friend once told me that anytime you drive through the swanky part of town, make sure to drive through the slums as well. Then you can appreciate what you have. When people consider affairs, perhaps they should consider the love and the violence together as well.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey D. Murrah
