I hate infidelity and the destruction it brings upon your family. I hate it even more when it touches members of my own family. Since I deal with infidelity on a daily basis, I know many of the signs to look for. When I see those signs at family gatherings I cringe. What makes it worse is that the cheater makes a point of lying to other family members about what they are doing. The ‘mask’ of being a good caring parent covers the reality of a a scheming cheater who cares more about their playtime and playmates than they do their own children.
When the recent behavior problems of the children are discussed. They blame the child and discuss the various medications that they are trying rather than openly address how the behavior has more to do with acting out in response to his parent’s affair than it does to any kind of chemical imbalance. I guess it is easier to blame the child and throw medications down their throat than it is to face the reality of dealing with the affair. I wondered how many other children are drugged or ‘medicated’ when the real problem is the parent’s misbehavior that they do not want to deal with. I was reminded how a family practice physician confidentially told me that about 75% of his practice is for psychosomatic issues. The people want medications to deal with problems that actually have other origins. I thought he was exaggerating at the time. But, when I was faced with this situation, I saw how that could happen. What made me sick was that the cheater sucked so many family members into their delusion that they looked like the ideal parent, while the child looked like a misbehaving brat. The reality was the other way around.
For more on dealing with affairs, consider my e-book on Surviving Your Partners Affair.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
