There has never been a bigger crock of baloney that for cheaters to claim they have no control over their choices. They choose what they wear. They choose where they travel to, and yes, they choose who they allow themselves to fall for. When they use the argument that they can not choose who they fall in love with, they are avoiding the responsibility for their choices. They speak of love like an animal like passion that comes and goes on its own. They talk as if they are slaves of this animal passion that comes and goes on a whim. If they can not control who they love, why do they have affairs with the attractive persons? If this logic of cheaters was true, they could fall in love with homeless bums and the first people they encounter at the bus stations. I have not heard of cheaters “falling in love” with the first person they encounter at nursing homes. Since there is selectivity in choosing who to have an affair with, there is volitional control over who they fall in love with. They do choose and control who they fall in love with. They do not want to admit, since that would bring accountability.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
2 Responses
OMG, Why didn’t I think of this!
I hope you don’t mind, but I just had to add this to my article listing excuses–and my fantasy smart-alec remarks back. You referenced age and attractiveness, but I had to add gender to it–I mean really if they only fall-in love with people of one sex or the other they are clearly controlling it. Not that sexual orientation is a choice, but wo a person chooses to fall for within their orienation is a choice.
Though the affair partners are not always attractive or more attractive than the spouse. I’ve frequently found that with Afffairs Down this is especially true.
Thanks so much. If you want to check out what I wrote for this new excuse, here’s the link.
http://www.midlifecrisismarriageadvocate.com/standing-actions_dealing-with-infidelity_excuses.html
It is the second to last excuse listed.
Rollercoasterrider,
Thanks for your comeback and the links. I have often heard the comment “I can’t control who I love!” and felt that I needed to address the issue. I am glad that you have put together a list of comebacks. The lies and falsehoods need solid comebacks in order to pierce through the illusions and delusions. Solid marriages are not built on delusions but on solid answers, solid communication and solid acceptance.
Best Regards,
Jeff