Kind words are powerful. Even in these days of fast paced daily life and stressful day to day struggling, the power of kind words remain strong. Kind words can give encouragement and draw your spouse closer to you, while harsh words often drive them away. The simple things like kind words are often lost in the shuffle when dealing with affair. Emotions are so raw and tensions are high that kind words are often pushed aside. Such times are when they are needed the most. When you are hurt, it is natural to ‘pull back’ in pain and protect yourself. You may even believe that the cheater is ‘not worth it’. They were worth it enough to marry. Affairs often cloud the issues with all the smoke, fuss and confusion they bring with them. It is easy to loose sight of priorities and small things like kind words.
When you use kind words, it benefits you and the cheater. It help you regain perspective and ‘keep your cool’. It is likely that the cheater does not deserve kind words. In such times you may want to ask, “What would happen if you always received what you deserved?” The motivation behind kind words in such times is often love and sacrifice, rather than doing it out of manipulation or habit. Using kind words will take you out of your comfort zone. I am not asking you to be dishonest, or to approve what they did. What they did was wrong. You do not have to return the wrong and punish them. You are their spouse, NOT their judge. They need your love more than your judgement during such times.
A little kindness often goes a long way during testy situations.
Best Regards,
Jeff Murrah
