As a cheater, or would-be cheater, you may find yourself struggling with thoughts about your lover or hoped-for lover. Those thoughts are powerful. The more you have them and replay them in your mind, the more power they have over you. At times those thoughts override your sane thinking. It is hard to control affairs, without controlling the thoughts and fantasies. The best way to stop the fantasizing is to quit fantasizing. Quite idealizing what life would be like with your lover. If you need to, think about their stinky feet and messy ways. Realize that they are human, filled with frailties and problems. As long as they are idealized, the fantasies will have power. In order to reduce that power, you have to cut them off from the power supply.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
