When a man says “I’m trading for a younger model”, I wonder if you cringe like I do. If he is talking about cars, it may be acceptable, yet when the younger model is another woman, I cringe.
Just scanning the news for stories about men trading for younger women is an education. Some articles use the term “trading in” and others use the term “trading up“. The headlines reveal biases in ways the authors never imagined. If they were being honest, they would talk about “trading down”.
The man may be convincing himself that he is getting a better deal. The excitement of the new is often a big lure.
For whatever reason, the cheater is assuming that there is more value in the younger woman than the one they are with. Back when I studied sex roles and physical attractiveness for several years at the University of Houston at Clear Lake in the early 80’s, I never encountered any study showing that younger women are more valuable than older women.
During those years, I spent hours in the library going through psychological journals, books and research monographs on the topics of sex roles and physical attractiveness to the point my eyes blurred. In those days researchers needed an awareness of all the other research on any given topic.
Sure, the younger person may be more attractive, more vivacious, and more energetic, but that does not make them more valuable. If anything the wife you are with knows you and accepts you the way you are. They have proven themselves time and time again.
One lesson I learned at the University was in Carol Snyder’s literature course. As part of the course, I read Anne Sexton’s Love Poems. The whole series of poems in the book document an affair situation she lived through. The poem, “For My Lover, Returning to His Wife“, caught my attention.
In that poem, Anne describes the resolute wife as being solid and dependable, whereas she uses the line, “As for me, I am watercolor. I wash off.” in describing her role as the younger model lover.
That image has stuck with me over the years. The younger, attractive model washing off like watercolor, while the proven, solid wife remains attached to the man, no matter what he does. The two of you have bonded and attached to each other. Unlike the lover, your wife will not wash out of your life and mind so easily.
If you have strayed or feeling the lure of straying, you will want the 30 Days to a Better Marriage program so that you will enjoy the wife who has proven her worth.
Best Regards,
Jeff
One Response
I read the poem.
For a person who committed Romaric felony i think she knows very little of the wife
How dare she “give permission” for the adulterous husband to return to his wife
Yes the wife is all that and so much more
God designed the companion of the man and designated only ONE that He himself forged
Outsiders and trespassers on the one flesh rightly ought to fear what consequences will land eventually upon their lives
Hopefully before they stand before the God whose image they have assaulted and misrepresented in their passion for fleshly override of His determined will for the man and the woman of lawful wedlock
Today laws are mocked ….we are told not to regard aliens who disregard our immigration laws as “illegals” yet what else do you identify a law breaker?
Illegal means not according to the law
Mans laws no longer hold when man determines to change them to accommodate any passion or sinful violation of Gods laws
We are saved by grace indeed and not by the works of the law yet though Christ fulfilled he law it also affirmed the value of the moral laws of God for protection of life, liberty and property necessary for life and even happiness
Boundaries set up by God for nations in Genesis for checks and balances wherein no one individual would be unaccountable
It’s easy to seen how the anti Christ will not be accountable as the world marches toward no boundaries …no morals…..no laws by the standard of He who created
When man has swept away God then no one is safe who is sucked into these wicked who discard the value of life
No boundary breakers will endure forever
And without the Saviour none will stand on That Day….
Repentance and seeking the salvation is required for entering into the Lord’s presents and every man and woman who has rejected the Saviour and continues to think they have of need of Him will enter in
They need to check this out…and soon
Forgiveness is available to all who seek it and receive Jesus Christ as their Lord and Saviour!
Without His righteousness we are naked and ill equipped to be in the presence of the Holy God
Married people are off limits
Actually those who enter into that dominion are in danger!
Married people who think m they love others should warn those prone to want to engage them in this activity should protect them by way of telling them of this sacred Union !
Younger women are vulnerable today as they are learning in school and media more and more that anything goes
Real men ought to protect them…not take advantage of them