Although there are people that excuse telling little white lies, the reality is lies are dangerous. Lies lead people like yourself to make poor choices.
You make decisions based on what you know, yet when what you know is a lie, it takes you places you hadn’t planned on going. Truth be told, all affairs start with a lie.
Liars start with little while lies. Their lies grow into ugly bald face lies. In their mind, they continue excusing the lies since they see them as small deceptions. They look at their intentions, not the damage they cause.
Don’t be surprised when cheater lie about their marital status. Although there are some AP’s who don’t care about marital status, there are many men and women who do. The liar leads them astray in believing they aren’t married.
Keep in mind that when they lie about marital status, it’s not beyond them to lie about HIV status or other STD’s as well. For them, one more lie is no big deal.
Part of the tragic consequences is that they use lies to start relationships where people get hurt. You get hurt, the PA gets hurt and possibly more get hurt.
Lies never stay limited to one area of the cheater’s life. When you look deeper, there are lies told in other areas of their lives along with other forms of cheating as well.
This means getting out of the situation involves some thorough truth telling in many areas. It requires being truthful with you, with others and with themselves. While they need to start telling the truth, you need to start telling yourself the truth about things and them as well.
You may not like the truth, but it has to be told. You need truth as well.
The liar couldn’t have gotten that far out of control without having impacted you along the way. One of the truths needing acceptance is that you need help.
You need help in terms of recognizing and telling yourself the truth about what’s going on and about how you’ve dealt with or avoided things.
You also need a support system as you go through this. Even Pinocchio needed a conscience in his journey toward telling the truth.
In the video “Getting Past the Affair Crisis“, I address the need for telling yourself the truth. Truth needs to become a way of life for you now. This also means you’re going to have to learn to hate lies. If you don’t hate the lies, they’ll sneak back into your thinking.
Truthfulness needs to become a way of living for you. It starts giving you a way out. Click and download your copy today and start making the kind of changes you need to in order to emerge from the mess created by the liar.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
