Part of my dealing with affairs involves handling addictive behaviors. Although not all affairs involve addictions, a surprisingly large percentage of them do.
Addictions come in many forms and expanses. The longer I work with them, the more ‘new’ ones I come across. The most recent one I encountered was an addiction to dating apps.
I’ve learned that the drug of choice varies from person to person, yet the addiction process is very similar across the spectrum.
Dating apps provide fast feedback. With each new profile and connection, there’s a rush of adrenaline. The thrill of someone showing interest in you can make you feel tingles. You look forward with anticipation to replies to your profile.
Each time they check their account or phone, there’s an emotional surge. The more exposure to new sites, the greater the possibility of hookups.
I mention this in connection with affairs since each profile response represents a potential hook-up. The person using the dating app is ‘on the prowl’.
When I was dating, the hot dating spots were often referred to as ‘meat markets’. In those days, you had to know the best places to go, otherwise, it was a matter of trial and error.
With dating apps, the meat market is as close as your phone. Your profile becomes the icebreaker in starting conversations.
With each response to the potential cheaters profile, they begin fantasizing about what may happen. Their mind lights up with potentiality. It gives them a source of excitement.
If one of those contacts turned into an affair, ending the relationship is just the start. As long as the cheater remains tuned into the dating apps, they’re at risk for another affair.
Getting past the affair also includes removing the provision for future affairs. Reducing the risk of affair relapse is critical to your marriage’s survival.
In the video “Overcoming Affair Relapse“, I guide you through what’s needed in reducing the danger of it happening again. I can tell you now that cutting out dating apps is essential if you want your relationship to have any hope.
There are also other high-risk situations, and triggers that need to be identified and dealt with. The video guides you in dealing with these threats.
Click and download the video and in minutes, you’ll have a clear game plan for dealing with the affair in a way that also reduces the risk of affair relapse.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
