One of the things infidelity brings with it is questions. When it happens you find yourself asking questions you never even considered before.
There was no reason to ever think such a situation was possible. The only time you’ve even seen some of the kinds of questions your facing is in the movies.
The tough question for today is “Do I ruin my wife’s affair partner’s seemingly perfect life by getting him fired?”
Let me begin by pointing out that the desire for revenge after an affair is a natural reaction. Thinking such thoughts doesn’t make you a bad person. Revenge might bring you a certain kind of satisfaction, but it may also make things worse in the long run.
Part of you wants to lash out and hurt them as they hurt you. You want someone to blame for what’s happened.
Crossing the line and acting on those thoughts is where things get out of hand quickly. Crossing the line between violence and revenge is a decision you can’t take back.
Ruining someone else’s life won’t bring your marriage back. Spreading hurt around won’t lessen your own pain.
I’m not going to tell you what decision to make. What I will say is that revenge isn’t the answer. It may provide a momentary feeling of satisfaction, but it won’t lead to anything good in the long run.
This is a question where you have to consider whether what you plan on doing will bring healing. One of the points I make in my material is the importance of the question “Will it bring healing?”
When your actions won’t bring healing, you’ll need to reconsider doing them. What will bring healing is letting go of your own hurts.
This is where the video, “Forgiveness: Stop the pain, Tear down the walls and remove the roadblocks” comes in. In the video I share with you ways of reducing your pain that don’t involve putting yourself in legal jeopardy, ruining someone else’s life or engaging in blackmail.
There are ways of stopping the pain that don’t include hurting others. I also point out how forgiveness is NOT about approving what happened or condoning it in any way. If that’s what you thought forgiveness was about, there are some things you can learn that will change your life.
When your mind is focused on revenge, it’s a signal that you’re hurting and need to do something. What’s important is doing something that brings healing before you do something that makes your situation worse than it already is.
Click and download your copy of the video today.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
