Discover the unexpected guilt that cheaters experience, even if they seem oblivious to it. Except, of course, for narcissists. Let’s table that topic for now. What’s fascinating is that non-narcissistic cheaters really do feel guilt.
But, here’s the catch – their guilt is misplaced. They feel remorse for all the wrong things – abruptly ending the affair, supporting the lover’s children, not staying in touch, and failing to commit. They say that they feel they ‘have to’ do these things. These misplaced feelings stem from being manipulated into believing that the lover’s emotions hold more weight than your own or their family’s.
When cheaters feel more guilt towards their lover than towards you, it’s a clear sign of misplaced emotions. The affair has twisted their priorities and messed with their emotional wiring.
They feel guilty for the things they shouldn’t, while neglecting to show remorse for the things they truly should feel guilty about. When they claim to be “confused,” they’re not lying.
They forget that their marriage to you changed everything. The dynamics of their relationships shifted, with you rightfully deserving their affections, unlike the lover. The lover is not entitled to their affections.
Here’s the harsh reality – cheaters owe the lover absolutely nothing. The lover uses emotional manipulation to exert pressure. Through secrets and shady actions, the lover blackmails the cheater into continuing the affair. The cheater pays a heavy price to keep the truth from surfacing.
It’s crucial to distinguish between legitimate claims on your spouse’s loyalty and the fabricated guilt wielded by the lover. Cheaters act as if there’s a ledger tracking their debts and obligations. Unfortunately, their guilt about the affair leads them to overcompensate in their relationship with the lover, attempting to “balance the books.”
The dirtier the affair, the more they believe they owe to the lover. They use emotional currency to buy their peace of mind. This is guilt in action.
In my video, “Help for the Cheater: Starting the Road to Recovery,” I delve into the necessary steps to end the affair and embark on a journey of healing. Take action now and download your copy.
Start erasing those emotional debts imposed by the lover. The cheater may not realize they have the power to reject those obligations and escape the pressure that plagues their life.
Keeping It Real,
Jeff
