Although high drama showdowns make for entertainment at the movies, such episodes are not good for relationships. Even though we want a one time episode to “get it all out”, life does not work that way. If you are expecting to ‘fix’ everything with one meeting or one talk with your spouse, it is unlikely to occur. Wounds, including the emotional ones take time to heal. In taking time to heal, it also takes time for the feelings to emerge, and the issues to become clear.
If you plan on having a big showdown, especially in public, you need to change your plan. Showdowns in public places are a form of manipulation. When you are wanting forgiveness, you want the genuine article, not something coerced out of someone due to manipulaiton. The big showdown may provide an emotional release and provide an audience, but it does little to resolve the issues concerning the affair.
Best Regards,
Jeff Murrah
