One of the features often found in affairs is that of emotional blackmail. Such situations can lead to affairs starting and also to affairs spinning out of control. In my next series of posts, I will deal with this issue and ways to avoid emotional blackmail situations.
1. Make sure what your are agreeing to in your dealings with others. Know what you are expected to provide, and when you are expected to provide it. Make sure you know what they other person is providing in return and when they will provide it. Many times agreements are made on assumptions rather than clear expectations. When people are using words with double-meanings, it is a dangerous situation.
One of the ploys used by exploiters and those interested in emotional blackmail are to use words with double meanings in order to trap people. Such loaded’ words are also used to trap people into sexually compromising situations.
2. Set clear boundaries. In setting boundaries, let the other person know what you are willing to do and what you will not do. When you have to say “NO” do not worry about them being upset with you. Unclear boundaries often lead to manipulation. Emotional blackmail starts with the manipulation of emotions and emotional situations. Since affairs involve intense emotional situations, it is a prime environment for emotional blackmail.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
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