I am often amazed at how the ‘doctrine of grace’ and ‘God’s love’ when placed in the hands of some theologians turn into a license to cheat. It could also be said that karma and the will of the one have also been twisted into excuses for infidelity. Cheaters are often drawn to those preachers, priests and religious leaders who emphasize grace, forgiveness, karma and God’s will in order to justify and excuse their behaviors.
Cheaters often need mental and theological support to keep doing what they are doing. In dealing with the cheater, you may need to dig into their theology as well. When they follow a theology that allows or condones multiple partners, frequent infidelity and cheating, it will only be a matter of time before they cheat again. When cheating is grafted into their spirituality, it will always bring forth fruit. Cheaters have ways of twisting any religious teaching into condoning their actions. They often find many ways of saying it is either ‘God’s will’ or that ‘God understands’ their actions. Each of this theological positions are different sides of the same coin. They each undermine the sanctity of marriage. It just so happens that when cheaters believe that God supports them in their actions, they become very entrenched in their mindset. Despite what they say, the reality is that they have constructed a God that condones adultery which gives them permission to do as they please, without feeling guilt, regret or consequences.
Sadly, I have heard reports of such thinking from Christians, followers of Islam and other groups. Cheating is not limited to one religion. Cheaters often bend and twist any religious into their own personal, sexual gratifying home-grown fetish.
So when you want to remove the cheating, you will also need to clean house in the religious areas as well.
Best Regards,
Jeffrey Murrah
